Straight men have sex
By Dr. Tony Silva
Sexual identities and sexual behaviours don’t always pair because sexuality is multidimensional. Many people recognize sexual fluidity, and some even identify as “mostly straight.”
Fewer people know that some men and women have lgbtq+ encounters, yet nonetheless perceive themselves as exclusively straight. And these people are not necessarily “closeted” gays, lesbians or bisexuals.
When a closeted gay or bisexual bloke has sex with another bloke, he views that sex as reflecting his secret identity. He is not open about that identity, likely because he fears discrimination. When a straight human has sex with another human, however, he views himself as straight despite his sex with men.
In my book, Still Straight: Sexual Flexibility among White Men in Rural America, I study why some men who name as straight have sex with other men. Large nationally exemplary surveys show that hundreds of thousands of straight American men — at least — include had sex with two or more other men. This discovery represents a disconnect between individuality and behaviour,
Sexual identities and sexual behaviours don’t always match because sexuality is multidimensional. Many people recognizesexual fluidity, and some even identify as “mostlystraight.”
Fewer people grasp that some men and womenhave lgbtq+ encounters, yet nonetheless perceive themselves as exclusively straight. And these people are not necessarily “closeted” gays, lesbians or bisexuals.
When a closeted gay or bisexual man has sex with another man, he views that sex as reflecting his covert identity. He is not open about that identity, likely because he fears discrimination. When a straight man has sex with another man, however, he views himself as straight despite his sex with men.
In my manual, Still Straight: Sexual Flexibility among Colorless Men in Rural America, I study why some men who identify as straight have sex with other men. Large nationally delegate surveys show that hundreds of thousands of straight American men — at least — possess had sex with two or more other men. This finding represents a disconnect between persona and behaviour, and researchers from
When Straight Men Hold Sex with Men
Paul, a slim, attractive, year-old ivory man who owns a landscaping company, was referred to me by his therapist (with whom he was making no progress) shortly after he attempted suicide. He told me that eight months previously, Julie, his fiancée, had discovered that he&#;d been having unprotected anal sex with men. When she confronted him, he denied it, but soon broke down and confessed. Devastated and angry, she broke off their engagement, accusing him of being duplicitous (she believed they were monogamous) and secretive. Worst of all, she felt frightened that he&#;d place her at risk for HIV and other sexually transmitted infections.
Paul loved Julie and said he knew she was the girl for him. They&#;d dated for three years and been engaged for one. But Julie had rebuffed all his desperate and obsessive attempts to triumph her back. Ultimately, she&#;d had a restraining command issued against him. Shortly after this, Paul engaged in a binge of sexual acting-out with both men and women, culminating in the suicide try that brought him to my o
Why do some straight men have sex with other men?
According to nationally-representative surveys in the United States, hundreds of thousands of straight-identified men have had sex with other men.
In the new book Still Straight: Sexual Flexibility among White Men in Rural America released today, UBC sociologist Dr. Tony Silva argues that these men – many of whom enjoy hunting, fishing and shooting guns – are not closeted, bisexual or just experimenting.
After interviewing 60 of these men over three years, Dr. Silva found that they relish a range of relationships with other men, from hookups to sexual friendships to secretive loving partnerships, all while strongly naming with straight culture.
We spoke with Dr. Silva about his book.
Why do straight-identified men have sex with other men?
The majority of the men I interviewed reported that they are primarily attracted to women, not men. Most of these men are also married to women and prefer to have sex with women. They explained that although they loved their wives, their marital sex lives were not as active as they